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Old 08-05-2003, 10:14 AM   #1 (permalink)
PD
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> > THINGS YOU'D LOVE TO SAY AT WORK BUT ...
> >
> > 1. I see your point, but I still think you're full of sh*t. :laugh:
> >
> > 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to
> > pronounce.
> >
> > 3. How about never? Is never good for you?
> >
> > 4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself
in
> > public.
> >
> > 5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see
it
> my
> > way.
> >
> > 6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
> >
> > 7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message..
> >
> > 8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
> >
> > 9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're
> saying.
> >
> > 10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...
> >
> > 11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
> >
> > 12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
> >
> > 13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
> >
> > 14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
> >
> > 15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about
you.
> >
> > 16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique
point
> > of view.
> >
> > 17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an
> artist.
> >
> > 18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely
> > coincidental.
> >
> > 19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
> >
> > 20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
> >
> > 21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
> >
> > 22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely
ceremonial.
> >
> > 23. And your cry-baby whiny-butt opinion would be...?
> >
> > 24. Do I look like a people person?
> >
> > 25. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
> >
> > 26. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
> >
> > 27. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
> >
> > 28. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
> >
> > 29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
> >
> > 30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
> >
> > 31. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
> >
> > 32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
> >
> > 33. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
> >
> > 34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
> >
> > 35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
> >
> > 36. Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.
> >
> > 37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
> >
> > 38. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay
checks.
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Old 08-05-2003, 01:35 PM   #2 (permalink)
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What do you mean "THINGS YOU'D LOVE TO SAY AT WORK BUT..."???

These are some of my frequently used favorites:

Quote:
I see your point, but I still think you're full of sh*t.

How about never? Is never good for you?

Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.

And I just can't figure out why no one invites me meetings these days...
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