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Old 06-27-2003, 11:14 AM   #1 (permalink)
PD
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Ever want to call someone stupid, but want to do it in a way that is politically correct? Here are some great suggestions:

A few clowns short of a circus

A few fries short of a Happy Meal

An experiment in artificial stupidity

A few beers short of a six pack

A few peas short of a casserole

Doesn't have all his cornflakes in one box

The wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead

One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl

A few feathers short of a whole duck

All foam, no beer

The cheese slid off his cracker

Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel

Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear

Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel

He fell out of the Stupid Tree and hit every branch on the way down

An intellect rivaled only by garden tools

As smart as bait

Chimney's clogged

Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor

Forgot to pay his brain bill

Her sewing machine's out of thread

His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels

His belt doesn't go through all the loops

If he had another brain, it would be lonely

Missing a few buttons on his remote control

No grain in the silo

Receiver is off the hook

Sky light leaks a little

Too much yardage between the goal posts :laugh: :laugh:
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Old 06-27-2003, 12:23 PM   #2 (permalink)
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DON'T FORGET ALSO:

He's as sharp as a beach ball.

If you gave him a penny for his thoughts you'd get change.

A room tempature I.Q.

As bright as Alaska in December.

Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.

He's so dense, light bends around him.

One neuron short of a synapse.

Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled.

Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasnt watching.

Takes him 1.5 hours to watch "60 Minutes"

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Old 06-27-2003, 01:24 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Opt 11E RUN AMUCK!

The lights are on but nobody's home

A few bricks shy of a load

For Canadian people:

There's no milk in his bag :laugh:







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Old 06-27-2003, 01:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
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His boat is in the water but the oars don't reach.
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